Day 353 Tiara

Violet is starting to act like a little princess, so much so that she has resorted to wearing a tiara...

Day 350 ho ho ho

To quote one of my favourite Christmas movies, "it's Santa!" Ok it may not be Santa it's the next best thing a baby in a Santa hat!

Day 315 Drinking in my pants

It's Saturday, so what better way to start the weekend by getting up, relaxing on the digs and drinking milk in just your pants? Well that's baby girls idea anyway....

Day 294 Climbing

Youngest daughter, as with any child in there first year, has been developing each day. Today age managed to climb the couch. At first at our shock as we didn't see her do it, then with a clap to say well done, now after her doing it all day we are tired as we have to run and get her off the couch before she flings herself mad off it. Many more days of pulling her off the couch ensue I am sure....

She finds her climbing spot and attempts to pull one foot up....

 

before failing in her first attempt, she prepares her other leg and pulls a face whilst doing so....

 

success! She has one leg up and soon will have another leg up...

 

smiling due to her success feeling proud of herself she now makes herself feel comfy...

 

and poses for the camera looking as if she is getting ready to jump off.

Day 289 Mummy and Daughter

Today's picture is mummy and her youngster daughter relaxing...

Day 249 Breakfast

Youngest daughter is having strawberries and toast for breakfast, how continental...

Day 227 standing

It now seems every week out youngest daughter chalks something off her to do list of development. Today this was her caught pulling herself up and standing all by herself aided. She then turned to me to smile to show how satisfied she was with her latest achievement

Day 201 Caught in the Act

She's so cute but in this picture she looks like she's been caught up to no good....

Day 188 Angry Birds

Ahhhh oh no the angry birds are attacking our little piggy !!!!!

Day 143 mucky pup

Baby girl is certainly starting to enjoy the delights of a non milk exclusive diet. Here she is today after her latest meal if plum and banana, very nice. Not only did she make a mess of herself but also of mummy and the sofa, i'm sure there's much more mess to come...

Day 120 Sit Ups

 

 Uh Oh look who is managing to sit up on her own accord now! Just 5 months old and now I'm sure the mayhem starts, we won't be able to leave anything anywhere as her and her big sister will be double teaming us and causing us endless mischief and mayhem, the fun starts here.....

Day 112 A visit

Today mummy went off to Blogcamp in Birmingham. Leaving me with the girls. So I enlisted to help of Nana and my nephew CJ, along with his mam. So we took the kids to Winkies, a local play area for children.

Both ER and CJ enjoyed being able to run around,play and be crazy and loud. Meanwhile TV got lots of attention by her Nana and her auntie.

CJ decided to part take on what has become mine and ERs weekly funny face competition....

And of course ER had to have hers taken....

Meanwhile TV was getting plenty of hugs and attention by Nana...

I'm guessing it won't be too long before she's up and playing with her sister and cousin. Meanwhile ER's trusty sidekick Rabbit guarded her shoes by wearing them whilst also getting ready 8 months ahead of time for Christmas by wearing a Santa coat...

After playing at Winkies for a good 3 hours we headed home so we could wave Nana and CJ off. A lively day spent with great family, we hope mummy had a nice relaxing day at her blogfest.

Day 108 Calpol

Baby girl has been to the doctors today to get some jabs. These are her third lot a her last now for a few months. She was being a bit agitated and grumpy so we decided it may well be a good time to give her some Calpol for the first time to sleep properly, this was her reaction....

Growing up

I can't believe that she's 4 and a half months. This was her first picture....

And now look at her....

She is no longer a wrinkly little baby but now looks, sounds and functions like a human being. She has started developing her own personality. Deciding what she likes and what she doesn't. She laughs and cries, and this, for now and the next year or so is her main form of communication.

At the moment she's a very happy child, often smiling and pleasing herself with her nonsensical mumblings. These amuse both me and her mummy wondering if she actually knows what's she's trying to say. I've spent time trying to get her to roll over into her front, something she hasn't quite done yet ....

But she is getting very close to....

Until she decides to give up....

Yet I don't want to wish anytime away as I already find she's growing up too fast and I cherish each day I come in from work and she realises I've just came in and greets me with a smile, in my mind she's thinking, "it's daddy, daddy's here! I've missed you daddy, " she'll always be my baby girl....

Day 72 Mmmmm Apple Cereal

Today TV had her first taste of proper(ish) food. We fed her special baby apple cereal. She of course made a mess of herself, getting most of it around her face rather than eating it, and couldn't grasp the fact that it was a spoon and not a bottle and tried to suck the spoon. But other than this is was a relative success and she looked like she enjoyed it.....

Dealing with stresses and strains

Many who read my blog will usually see how light hearted and family orientated it is, but this post is a little heavier. Many will know my OH and possible have read her blog over at peagreenpod many will know that she has been suffering since the birth of our child.

We've been trying to deal with these issues together and trying to get through it but this is easier said than done. Naturally there are good days and there are bad days you just deal with this. However help is not always what it seems, we have often grown frustrated as the so called help dwindles and twiddles it's thumbs, and the the other night I tried to research help for dads who have to support Post Natal Depression (PND) mothers and found very little offering help and advice. All I was looking for was advice and tips for Dads on how to support their loved ones but found very few websites offering this, and any that did offer advice and help were simply spouting the same things as commonly said, many that sounds that one person has written them years ago in one text book probably written when Freud was alive!

For those of you not aware of this advice it basically consists of a little practical support, such as helping around the house, can go a long way towards lifting there depression. Even the odd hour of babysitting, so you can have time alone. Being there for them and listening.

Now I'm not saying this advice isn't useful or helpful, it is, I just find it very frustrating that there isn't more help or advice for this, as it is very frustrating for myself when I am trying to help my OH go through what she is. You feel useless and powerless and all you want to do is make things better and you really don't know how. But to match this, you grow bitter and angry towards to so called help that is meant to be there for us.

We have recently had a Care Co-ordinator visit us a few times, only to seemingly drop off the face of the earth. OH had a call before an appointment to say her Care Co-ordinator wouldn't be visiting today due to sickness, which is fair do's everyone is entitled to sickness leave, I'm not angry at that. What I am angry at is that 3 weeks later we still had no contact from anyone, not the Care Co-ordinator or the office to offer someone else or see how we were coping, which is quite worrying. If they are meant to be a support network and help us get structured and on to a path health and happiness, then they have left us completely by ourselves to deal with it. As to say if they were our safety net from a fall then they buggered up cos my ass is hurting!

They promised a lot and have delivered very little, they promised us a support worker who would come visit and help set up activities for my OH to do with the kids etc. This was promised over 6 weeks ago and yet nothing has happened. They promised to help give us specifically my OH structure for her days and yet nothing has happened. Key information again missing. This is very worrying, my OH suffers from her condition to herself and has often questioned her existence, I'm sure there are many more woman who feel like this in the area, let alone country and it is worrying to think that they too are being given false pretences by this so-called support.

I know this post might sound like I am complaining and directing my frustrations all in one direction, and I certainly could have done more to avoid this situation, but who do you direct all your concerns in this area to? I want and will help my OH deal with this, and I will do whatever it takes to help, but I'm not ashamed to admit I need help in doing so. I want the help that is meant to be there but I will not allow it to offer us these false pretences and be very sceptical of it until it has followed through.

I feel there should be more out there to help fellow Dads in this situation, not specifically the support system failing but for Dads who have to support their OH going through with PND. I know its all important that in this situation we have to suck it up and do as much as we can and it's all about the mother getting better, I'm not trying to take that away. All I suggest is more information for Dads and even a kind of support group etc, after all Dad's in this situation need to vent too and to talk to other people in the similar situation or those who have previously experienced it that can help. That way we can help the mothers as much as possible and what works for one Dad might not work for another but it's worth trying isn't it? Theres obviously various different reasons for PND and different ways mothers feel it and cope with it, but the end goal for all is surely the same isn't it, to get the mother feeling better.

I'd love for anyone to comment and air their views, please tell me if you think I'm misunderstanding this whole situation, or whatever....

What it means to be Dad...

Over the last week I've been thinking....

I was stood in the kitchen washing the dishes (Shock horror a man doing the dishes) I can't confess that well and eldest ER was being abnormally cute. As I watched her prance around singing and pretending to be an adult it hit further home that I'm now a Dad and how much I enjoyed it. TV is only just 2 months old and so far (knock on wood) isn't any trouble, she sleeps through the night and enjoys falling sleep on me, something I at the moment Cherish as much as possible as I know one day this will stop and she will eventually be too embarrassed to be seen with her Daddy let alone fall asleep in my arms.

The truth is no matter what I do in life nothing will ever compare to being Daddy. I want my children to call me Daddy for as long as possible, I don't look forward to the day when it gets shortened to Dad, as my children will always be the frail little creatures that look up to me and rely on me to feed, clothe and bathe them. To nurse them to sleep and to kiss any bumps or bruises better.

I look forward to each activity in the day that allows me to be Daddy, I look forward to every hug and cuddle from my girls and embrace each one as if it was the last. Every chance I get to read the bed time story or take the kids to bed I enjoy as I am aware that one day the girls will be too old for this and won't require me to make sure I leave the big light on as they are scared of the dark (even though as Dad I do the Dad thing and worry about the waste of electricity)

I miss the children when I'm at work, I try keep work to what it needs to be but inevitably I have to work more than 40 hour weeks, I know that, my girlfriend knows that, its the way it is but I always try to rush home to see the kids before they go to bed, unless I'm working a late shift and then theres no chance as I don't finish until midnight.

Each day I have off I cherish to spend time with my daughters and their mummy to ensure we create happy and enjoyable memories for the girls to look back on and share in the future. And naturally I worry about they girls when I am not around and even scare myself at the thought of what would happen if something bad as to happen to me, but I try snap out of this quickly and focus on the here, the now and the positives and the happy memories we have created.

But most importantly I enjoy and cherish every time I see the girls smile and laugh and I feel sad every time their mummy sends me a picture message/tweet of them smiling of laughing and I am not there and have missed it in person.

My three girlies (2 Daughters plus mummy) are my world, my life and each day I can only try but make them as proud of me as I am of them.

Day 43: A special day....

Today is the anniversary of a special day. You see a year ago today I had my first date with a very special lady. My OH Peagreen Gwin. Our first date happened in a mutual place, in Harrogate where we now currently reside together. It Happened in a Bar called Alberts. Neither of us knew Harrogate particularly well, we'd ask friends to suggest places to go and this was where we'd settled on. It was nothing fancy, we'd decided we'd keep it simple and meet for drinks, so we can converse with one another.

It was 2 days before Valentines, I'd got to the bar around 20 minutes early, I'd drove so I couldn't get myself drunk and make a fool of myself. I still remember how she looked when she walked in the room. She stood out from the great, so beautiful, so independent, strong and confident. She stood out (and not because she as walking floral carpet trousers) but because to me she as the most beautiful woman in the room. I couldn't take my eyes off her all night and loved every minute of that evening.

I remember we had a good night kiss as I waited with her for her taxi, I was nervous and she led the way in for the kiss. She confessed after that she thought I didn't like her because I didn't lead for the kiss but once I'd got home she knew I liked her as I sent her a text to say I hope she got home safe and that I'd had fun. What I've never told her is that from the night on, I've been crazy about her and have never stopped thinking about her. She is my world, and everyday I love her more and more. Thank you Peagreen Gwin.

Today doesn't mark our anniversary, this is just the anniversary of our first date. But it would be a significant date in our lives. Without this meeting I'd never had got to meet her daughter ER.....

And of course this night would have been the night when TV was a twinkle in her mummys eye as she was far from our thoughts.....

I am so lucky to have met this wonderful woman and I can't wait to celebrate our official anniversary and make many more happy memories. It's been a rollercoaster first year, everything has happened so fast and changed so much, but I have never been happier and it's all down to this wonderful woman, Thank you Peagreen Gwin, I love you so much xxx

Day 42: Literally mountains of washing.....

After work today I got home. Settled down to a cup of tea and decided to watch the football that I had recorded earlier and sort the washing out. WHAT? A guy sorting the washing out? Yes thats right that's not a typo. There is literally mountains of washing lying around the house, most of it is done, just not been sorted and put away. So I felt it was quite right to share the various loads of washing as my picture of the day as, firstly I haven't any other ideas what to do today and secondly to prove that, at times, I can be organised and contirbute to the housework.

First there is mummy's nice and neat pile......

Then there is eldest childs modest pile......

Then there is my pile, featuring my faveourite silky boxers....

And then there is youngest childs few clothes....

....er did I say few, I meant mountain, Litterally! The smallest member of the family goes through more clothes than Lady Gaga goes through in a concert.

The Importance of being cute

The past weekend saw us take a visit further north (true north) to Nana's house. We hadn't been to Nana's since Christmas so it was nice to go up there and stay the night. As always, it's nice to see family but even more nice to have people focus their attnetions on the kids, distract them and let me and mummy rest.

Saturday saw us take a trip shopping. My nephew and ER and TV's young cousin CJ, who is 3 years old, so a couple of months younger than ER tag along with his mummy. Now CJ gets along very well with his cousins, and they play very well together. CJ is your typical little boy, very excitable and noisey. I love seeing him as he is full of energy and I don't think I've ever seen him and he's not been running around, shouting, jumping and generally just enjoying himself. He is the kind of child that would find a wet box and a breeze as something he could have enormous amounts of fun with.

Due to his energy he can often make ER extra shy, although she often talks about him and says that they are best friends and she wants to play with him, when in reality when we arrive for this to happen she goes quiet and doesn't actually play with him, instead opting to cuddle up to an adult and play whilst CJ runs around with his tongue out screaming and shouting.

As we went shopping, partly so Nana could ask ER what she wanted for her looming 4th birthday, both ER and CJ shoed how cute the can be by firstly co-operating enough to hold a basket of shopping together....

Followed by a spot of dancing together in the shop.....

befor CJ decided to sing ring a ring or roses, and ensured everyone saw that he knew the all fall down part.....

CJ also got the chance to go on the digger ride, which again got him excited. ER is howeverm scared of these rides, as she cried the last time I put her on a ladbug one a few weeks previously so as CJ enjoyed his drive on the big digger, and ensured all the buttons got bashed and everyone heard him having fun, ER clutched Nana's hand look on to CJ....

But as anyone will tell you who have mulitple children or children who have close friends and family, they can be at this age very cute at times hen they are agreeing and not arguing. This photo particullary sums up how they were together at the weekend, as CJ enjoyed holding ER's hand and if he ever staryed too far away ER would do what she does best and become bossy and shout until she got her way often shouting CJ's name across the shop floor until he reverted back to her side holding her hand. ER ensuring everyone could see her being an adult and mature and makign CJ act appropriatley in public, something many have often failed to do....

As you can see that both were being undeniably cute. This tactic probably helped when we went to the Toy Shop to find ER a birthday idea/present and they both obviously came out with a toy each to play with. But we can't think about the child that does not, can not speak that is TV. She is often cute and her sister is equally cute with her trying to be big sister. Now no visit to Nana's wouldn't be complete with both ER and TV being spoilt and getting something new. As ER got a new toy Nana wheeled out TV's new vibrating chair, something she enjoyed emmensley with the toy giraffe and elephant hanging over, she particullary enjoyed bashing the giraffe and making him swing.

But what about CJ, how is he around her? Well this weekend saw him being extra cute towards his little cousin. as she was strapped in her car seat, not being able to do too much that gurgle and gargle and look at her brand new toy mobile strapped to her car seat with her wide eyes, CJ kept chekcing on her, someting he hadn't done too much previously in his few visits. He even attempted to read her a story....

After Lunch we dropped ER off at CJ's house so they could play before we went home, she was disappointed when I came to pick her up so we could go home, started crying and I even got told off by my nephew for coming to pick her up. Hopefully this is the sign of a strong relationship for the cousins and a sign of a good future for them. I often remember of times when I got to play with my cousins hen we were children and would love for my children to have a strong and close relationship with their cousin.

But alas any post wrote about the weekend can not not mention the snow. It Snowed and although I tried to get ER to go sledging and make a snow angel to no avail, I did manage to throw the odd snowball or two at the children, without them being aware who it was. But unfortunatley there wasn't enough snow for my to build my traditional igloo, hopefully there will be more soon.....

As we got back home to a cold house Eldest ER decided to go get our blanket to hea us all up, cue lots of laughing as she stuggled being a small child dragging a large double quilt, still we didnt' offer to help, but instead laugh as she fell over, are we terrible parents of did we just see the comedy value?